WHAT’S IN A NAME ? - Part 7

There are IMPERIAL names of kings and queens such as ARTHUR, HENRY, PHILIP, RICHARD, ANNE, ANTOINETTE, ELIZABETH, ISABEL and VICTORIA. We also have emperors -- JULIUS CESAR, ALEXANDER, FREDERICK and NAPOLEON, not to mention the legendary Spanish hero A.L. CID nor the mythical almighty ZEUS. Benito and Santiano refer to this group as the ROY-AL family who live in their CAHARIAN. Other names refer to royal TITULAR as in REY (or the plural REYES and the possessive DE LOS REYES). Then we have REX (not of the Tyranosauros species) and the next-in-rank PRINCIPE, REYNECITA (not just ENIE-body), or BARON. From ancient times, we have an Egyptian FARAO. To represent East Europe, CZARINA will be listed as part of NOBLE-lity. To represent the local ruling crowd, LAKANDULA and PATRIARCA can join. QUIN-CIANO will definitely deny that he is queen of the “promdi”. Difficult to decipher is REYNO, which may denote a male queen (opposite of Reyna) or a negative king (opposite of Rey-yes).

Names also hint of parental expectations, fantasies, mistakes or plain ERROLs. JRS has not become JOSE RIZAL. BAYANI may have the same problem as APOLINARIO, AGUINALDO, DEL PILAR, BONIFACIO and DAGOHOY. ANGELO may also have the same problem as MICHAEL, GABRIEL and RAFAEL. RECTOR and PASTOR are not priests, IGNATIUS is not a Jesuit, BENEDICTO is not a Benedictine, FRANCISCO is not a Franciscan and PIOUX is not a pope. Some fathers even had presidential aspirations for their children: GEORGE, IKE, CONRAD, HAROLD, FERDINAND, MARCOS, ELPIDIO, DIOSDADO and GLORIA. PERFECTO might be impossible to achieve. So far, Ranoco has lived up to his ELVIS name. We hope BALASABAS is just a misnomer. We don’t know what AMADOR or VALENTIN’s dad had in mind when they were baptized. ADONIS is straight from mythology. Aldemita brags that he is an abbreviated version of movie star AGA, as Elmer belongs to the familia ng mga GOPO. Possibly, they all long to become ADORABLE. BABY, BOY and JOVENCIO can’t be forever young, but YANGYANG might be able to do it -- twice pa nga. Quintin may have been a “QT pie” as a baby but, now, no more. Although both of them are five-four, FORTUNATO is above target while SIXTO is below target. NONO and are always supportive with their yes-yes and yes-na, respectively. It seems strange that NONARAFFY, SHAK, BENNY, REGGIE, RICKARD and OCTAVIANO are girls while JILL, NENE, NICKI, FLORY, MICHIEL and AUDREY are boys. In fact, LUZ, LUCILA, and ROSARIO are also CA-MACHO males. The Makati office has a male and a female VENUS. We hope CAYAMAMA is not dependent on his mother. Lilia will confuse you even more -- this mama is a PAPA.


With his built-in echo-chamber, SRF habitually repeats any name three times. When he says JOE-JOE-JOE, suddenly JMA/JSR/JLA all turn their heads. When he calls TON-TON-TON, then ASV/AML/ANS turn their heads too. He also creates the same problem at employee-council meetings when he calls JUN-JUN-JUN because PCB/LTC/IFH (management side) and SHV (union side) react simultaneously. We can make it easier for SRF, and even improve overall corporate performance, by putting together Rodriguez, Soriano and Tobias because, as they say, “two EDs are better than one”, and therefore three is better than two. Getting the idea, Milan, Lopez and Faustino try to create a second set of because four should be better than three, five should be better than four, and so on, ad ED-ED-EDFABULARUM, to carry this EDLES argument (de-BATE na naman) to the extreme. Buti na lang, JIN does not usually work closely with MEMBREVE, LIBUNAO, and REMULLA. Otherwise, we run the risk of confusion: LITOng-LITO na, LITOng-LITO pa.